Mormonism - Truth vs False

A long time ago when I lived in England. I was born a Catholic. I just never trusted the religion due to my parents being very abusive and some of the clergy too. My step-father would get the clergy to help abuse my in more ways than one. This as far as I'll go right now. I may post about the abuse I suffered at the hands of my family in the England/Europe when growing up as a child and adult even. It's a very long bitter childhood. I felt alone and very bitter to all my family. I grew up with nine brothers I was the only female. This was a very troubled time for me.

The time when I learned that Faith mattered was when I was four years old and my Nana Lily, my biological father's mother. The only family member who loved me and treated me with love, along with my only brother who treated me the same way. Taught me to read the Holy Bible. Nana Lily believe in God, Jesus, and Holy Spirit. She taught me all about the stories in the bible. How the came to be written. WHo wrote the bible and why the bible was written. I found it uplighting.

If I knew then what I know now I would've never turned my back on the Catholic faith. I tried many different faiths in my lifetime. I first tried Jewish faith. I found them very restrictive on what the women could do. This did make me feel like I was less of a human being. I then tried Jehovah Witnesses. I liked what I learned about the faith. I did stop taking blood transfusions, it made it hard for some things like surgeries I had. Especially when I had my brain tumor. Having cancer in the brain was hard. My own family even told me I should die. I mean what mother wants her child to die to claim on a life insurance? WHo would do that to their own flesh and blood?

Then I tried the Chruch of England. It just wasn't me. Then Methodist. That was somewhat boring. It put me to sleep. I still read my bible while I pursued my dream of finding the right religion for me. I then at the ripe age of twenty-nine, I found a Mormon missionary in the town centre. The two missionaries talked with me in the town about the Book of Mormon, I was intrigued. I wanted to know more. They made an arrangement to come to my flat(apartment) to talk more about the Book of Mormon and their religion. I wanted to find out if this religion was for me.

They finally came to my place. They came regularly and we talked for hours. I read I studied the Book of Mormon. I then got the quad book. It contained Book of Mormon, D&C, Pearl of Great Price, Holy Bible. I would carry it everywhere I went. Read it, study it. I found the religion I wanted to be part of. The only thing was their church service was very long one. It was also split into separate rooms and sections. There was one for Sunday School, also one for adult women(Relief Society), main service. I was three hours lone in total. It was worth it.

Mormonism

Rule of the Faith

• No sex before marriage and complete fidelity after marriage.  Mormons believe the family is essential to God’s plan, so we don’t do anything that could jeopardize that.  The 10 commandments in the Bible says, “Thou shalt not commit adultery.”

• No alcohol or drugs.  Why?  We don’t want the effects of alcohol or drugs to influence us to make poor decisions.

• No dishonesty. Mormons believe it is important to keep Christ’s commandment in the Bible, to be honest with other people.  We aren’t perfect at it, but we strive to do our best.  The 10 commandments say not to “…bear false witness.”

• Donate 10% or more of your income to charity and the building up of the kingdom of God.  We believe that God is the Creator of the world.  We obey the law of the tithe to show our trust in God.  Because of the church’s almost complete lay ministry, the tithes are only spent for good instead of lining the pockets of a professional pastor.

• Do not view pornography.  We believe it’s incredibly belittling to women to treat them as objects, and pornography tempts the viewer to commit sin.  The 10 commandments say “thou shalt not covet.”

• Do not engage in same-sex relationships.  We are taught that marriage is ordained between a man and a woman.  We have great love and respect for ALL people–including gays and lesbians.  They are welcome to come to church and participate in the church, and we love them just as we would anyone else.  

• However, we do believe the Bible’s teachings that romantic relationships are ordained by God to be between man and woman.

• Dedicate Sundays to the Lord.  The 10 commandments from the Bible includes the commandment “Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy.”  We attend church on Sundays where we study the words of Christ and worship God.

• No foul language.  We keep our language clean and respectful.  As it says in the 10 commandments, “Thou shalt not take the Lord’s name in vain.”

• No cigarettes, coffee, tea, coffee or tobacco.  We believe life is a gift from God and we do our best to keep our bodies healthy and clean.  

• Teenagers shouldn’t date until 16 years-old.  We believe that teens should be careful to develop wholesome relationships in high school and should wait to develop serious boyfriend/girlfriend type relationships until they are of age to start courting and marrying.  This helps them to prevent the temptation of sexual sin.

• No abortion.  Members of the church strongly oppose abortion and do not participate in abortion in any way.  The 10 commandments say, “Thou shalt not kill.”  Church leaders have opened the possibility for abortion in extreme instances of danger to the mother’s life, incest, and rape.

• Gambling.  Mormons don’t bet money on games of chance or play the lottery.

I later was kicked out after like fours years in the faith. I was told I either stop drinking Pepsi and coffee or be removed from the church. I told them I just couldn't do that. I stopped the coffee. It wasn't a problem. The Pepsi was the problem. It was just a soda drink. nothing deadly in that. What was so wrong with a soda? It couldn't hurt me or anyone I was with. I was told I couldn't even talk with the friends I'd made in the church after I was removed from the church. This was so annoying. I was all alone again. I had nobody to talk with, nobody to turn to either. I was lost.

I later found someone coming to my door. they were from a church, a Baptist church. I was turning thirty-two at the time. I went to the church. It was a newly built church and the pastor was a nice friendly man. He approached me and we talked a while. He arranged for me to do a course called the alpha course. It was to teach about Jesus, God, and the Holy Spirit. They were so kind, friendly and upbeat. I did the Alpha course and then got baptized in the church. I went almost every week. I stopped reading the Book of Mormon, I did keep the scriptures though.

Then when I was struggling to cope I found out my best friend died. I told my friend Allie. She put me in touch with a person In America. Their name will be nameless. They are now my partner. We have been together for nearly thirteen years. It'll be thirteen this October, thirteen on November 10th this year married. I think becoming a Catholic was the right choice. I have a stronger faith than I have ever had. I pray, study the bible daily.

Imperfection

Imperfection

I believe watching this video on YouTube. It made me think about think about my imperfection. I know I sin a lot of the time. We all as Christians sin daily. We need to profess our faith to God and the Lord Jesus. We need to understand that we are Christians that have sinned and keep sinning daily. We know what to do to correct our imperfections. We just have to confess our sins to him who will forgive and give us his unconditional love and understanding. He knows we are imperfect and sin. He will forgive us. He is a forgiving God.

Jesus Christ gave us the sacraments to follow Jesus footsteps to go up to be with you in heaven. Heavenly Father gave us his only son so we will have everlasting life. It is why we are born imperfect due to the original sin by Adam and Eve. We need to go to confession regularly. I know I don't go as regular as should. I need to go to confession more often. Also we need to confess our sins to the Lord Jesus Christ and Our Heavenly Father. They are the ones we must confess our sins to. We can pray for guidance, strength and many other reasons. We need help and strength to not sin. We need guidance from the Holy Spirit and Jesus so we can go to heaven when it is our time to leave our love ones and join those who have died before us in our families.

Remember: We are born imperfect. We need to ask for forgiveness from our Heavenly Father and Jesus. We can pray to the Holy Spirit and Our Mother Mary too. They will send our prayers to Jesus and Our Heavenly Father.

Mother Angelica - Inperfection as an Oppotunity

Resolutions Vs Goals

Every year we make a new year Resolutions. It's like me make rules we want to change about about ourselves and make us a new person. These can be classes as goals we make. Mine are to get closer to God and Jesus. To pray the rosary daily rather that to just pray it when I feel like it. You should not just do it because you feel you have to. You do it because God is there guiding you to do what is needed to be a better Christian.

To be a better Christian shouldn't be a New Year Resolution. It should be something you do daily to keep connected with God, Jesus and Our Blessed Mary. If it wasn't for The Blessed Mary we wouldn't have Jesus or be here today. Through Our Blessed Mary we have Jesus who gave his life so we can be saved. He saved our souls to give us everlasting life. Unconditional love and mercy. We have so much through Our Blessed Mary and Our Savior Jesus Christ. He gave everything to give us life everlasting.

Without Jesus sacrifice we wouldn't have a chance at anything. He gave his life to save ours. We pray to Jesus, God the Father and The Holy Ghost forgiveness of our sins. We go to church, go to confession to a Priest and tell our sins. Then we are forgiven. We all have this due to the sacrifice Jesus gave for all of us. Without Jesus sacrifice we wouldn't have a hope in hell at having a better life.  It was Jesus who gave us that second chance at life.

We got everlasting life. Remember this when you think about your New Year Resolutions or Goals you make for the new year. I know mine are always the same. To get closer to God and Jesus. TO be a disciple of Jesus and God the Father. They gave me life. They gave me a second chance at living this life I could have ruined.

My Goals are as follows

1. Study the Bible daily
2. Pray three times a day
3. Pray after studying the Bible
4. Pray the Rosary daily
5. Live a Christian Life 
6. Use the Gifts God has given me

These are my Goals for the year. I know without God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost I can not do a single thing. With them in my life, in my heart I can do anything. God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost give me the strength, guidance and hope and faith to carry on each day I live.

Without God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost I can no overcome my mental illness, physical and emotional problems without them in my life. I believe, I have faith in the Trinity (God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost) in my life. They keep me going through the rough times and the good times. 

Sunday Mass and Prayer

At church, I wasn't sure if I wanted to prayer. I closed my eyes once I positioned my chair. I hate having to use my chair, but I get so dizzy I collapse or I'm in intense pain in knees, lower back and my ankles are constantly swollen. For the past month, I'd been without my laptop. Now that I have it, I'm thankful for the guy who fixed my computer and to God for helping me get through the last month.

After the Eucharist I felt compelled to pray. I'd said a short one before the start of mass. That was a thank you note to God. But this time I was compelled to say a long prayer unto Mary and one to the Holy Ghost. While praying as they started singing the last song. I heard from God. I know it was him. He touch me. I felt warm, cosy and content deep inside. I asked for peace, and for forgiveness for all my sins.

It was like for years I'd never felt loved, but I now know that I needed God to enter my whole body and mind, for me to know true unconditional love. I now know my partner loves me. I know my friends care about me and I don't have to buy their love. I also feel free, free from my family and their not so nice abuse they thrust onto me. I'm glad I'm not in England, but I can't wait to be an American. I hope it's soon...

Thursday Quote

Those who have read the Holy Bible from cover to cover

And have continued to read it on a daily basis

Are considered by God to be well read

Saturday Road Trip

I was woken up this morning by Pacer around 6:15am. I got up, feeling rather tired and I know the cats wanted feeding. I was getting so dizzy, I fell, hitting my head on the cupboard. Not being able to feed the cats, I sat on the couch and tried to stop myself from getting dizzy. The dizzy spells are now constant. I hate the feeling the dizzy spells do to me, I want to be healthy and happy.

It's now 6:55pm, I'm watching Bones on TV and finding it very relaxing to watch, even though the episode is a very old one. Anyhow, At the farm and walking around the place, I felt a connection with God and Christ. When the guy was touching my head, I felt a inner glow. It was like God was guiding to be there, to be able to talk with Lourdes near the end. While Suzie Q was getting the car, I had a good talk with Lourdes and I felt her anguish and her pain. I have placed her family on my heart. God knows our pain, our inner turmoil. He is there for us all. I believe I'm here in Indiana for a reason.

Praying for my partner's family and my sisters and their families, this is something that will never stop. I pray daily to God and the Holy Ghost for my sisters and helping me gain strength and guidance to help my sisters and friends at church.

Why I'm Afraid ?

Right now I'm thinking about what is frightening me from not transitioning. There are a few factors. One my parent's family, two my church friends and three all my online and other friends. This is difficult to come to terms with. Each time I look into the mirror, I see a face, mainly male. I have facial hair, my hair is short. My voice doesn't sound feminine too much. Most people who I call, call me sir.


Anyhow, my partner is 100% behind me if I change. There is one thing that bothers me. This is losing my partner as a friend and partner in a loving relationship. I've been told we won't be together as a couple as I'm gay. They aren't gay.  I am confused and lost in this world.


I believe in God, I'm a devote catholic and friends at church don't listen to me, when I try and tell them I'm not female. It just goes in one ear and out other. Something else is bothering me, does God disown you if you are trans and have a gender change operation? this is something I don't know...

I believe in God, Christ and the Holy Ghost. I believe that we are all created in God's likeness. But what if you inside are male, but body is female. And you change the body to match inside. Does he love you then? Does he want you then?

Blessings from God

Over this last week, I have been having trouble believing in what Amy said at our C.R.H.P. meeting which was at Chela's home. Anyhow, I came out to them asking for help to get together with them to get the money for my citizenship test. I felt like no one cared, but the words of Amy stuck in the back of my mind. She told me by Memorial day I would be a citizen. This was annoy and conflicting with what I believed as fact. At this time we had $500 in our savings account. Which was for citizenship.

Finally I cracked down and cried. After we had to take $300+ out of our saving to put in our chequing account to be able to pay rent. Anyhow I cried every night for days. This was something I never told my partner. Anyhow, my therapist told me to ask the church. I finally prayer last week and wrote a long email to a lot of my church friends, plus father and deacon. Anyhow, I been getting emails back from one lady that kept me believing that God existed and he was there for me. Well two ladies at first, now my whole church family and friends.

Now the church is going to help us pay for citizenship test filing the forms. I know we have to pay the money back. But I feel it's a gift from God. He made me wait till the right time. I don't know how to explain this, but it's true. I said a long prayer of thanking to God, Christ and everyone at church who has put up with my moaning, annoying bad humor and anything I just blab about. Plus Suzie Q always gets me bratting out like no tomorrow. So I thank God for my church and family and friends in Indy and I'm glad to be alive. I'm glad to actually feel happy and not feel guilty about being happy.

Surgery and Prayer

Today my MIL was taken to St Francis South Hospital to have surgery, to remove the cancer. I'm hoping she is going to recover quite well. I have been in constant prayer throughout the day. I am hoping God has plans for her to get well and become semi healthy. I just called Suzie, she is going to collect me and we are going to Helen's for the last Wednesday of the Lenten season. I have a funny feeling that tonight is going to be way spiritual for me, I even think God is going to get me praying again, which I'm getting used to now.

Praying is something I found hard and wasn't sure what to say in a prayer. During most meetings with the girls, I would pass and not want to pray at the end in front of them all. I was so embarrassed about them hearing me muddle along. I have never felt comfortable praying in a room with others around me. Not sure why, but I have always. Now since lent, I have become enriched in God's love and the Holy Ghost is administering to my soul, heart and mind. I believe God has something for me to do, but I have to feel comfortable to pray, sing and do anything in the company of others.

People around me are seeing a change in the way I act and do things now. I don't see a difference, but I believe maybe I am changing, but for good I hope. Now the surgery is over and my MIL can heal and become anew in God. I want to become anew in God too. I have found that with my MIL having surgery and getting diagnosed with cancer, has made me get a closer connection with God. He is telling what I am to do and say around others, which makes it easier to pray and talk around others at church and my close friends.

If you feeling alone, lost and without hope. Pray. Yes Pray. Prayer is the first thing you should do. Pray for God and the Holy Ghost to enter your body, mind and heart and he will administer to you. Not sure why, I just believe God is working in me right now. I feel his presence inside me. I feeling so refreshed and alive with his love. I have come to know he forgives me for all my transgressions. I have also forgave my family and anyone who hurt me in anyway in my past. If you forgive others, God will forgive you.

Little children, come unto me

Look at this picture, what does it say to you? Think carefully for a moment, listen to your heart, your mind and spirit. Listen to hear the voice. Are you listening? 

When you listen to your heart, mind and body God will tell you his plan for you in his kingdom and how you can get there. For such a long time, I ignored the voice, I ignored the calling from him. Now I am alive with him inside me, yes inside. He touch me, he uses me, not in a bad way. In a good way. He is guiding me, to be his disciple and he is my guardian angel, guiding and letting me follow him into his kingdom.

Remember what he said to the two criminals either side of him as he hung on that cross dying. "You will be in my kingdom." Yes we can be there with him, you just have to believe, trust and obey him. It might be hard at first, but boy you'll be glad you did. I know I am glad, at time yes I get lower than the lowest. But then I try and remember God is in me, I just have to get him to make me feel better. 

Just think for a moment, Jesus said to go to him, not as we are. But as children. we are his children, his brother and sister. God to him and he will love you, care for you and guide you. Ask for him to come into your heart, soul and body. he will guide your feet and you'll go on the right path and success in your life. I have never felt good at anything in my life, but now I know I'm a good writer, okay my grammar sucks a little, but I am getting there. He is helping me, giving me the tools to be a writer. 

We can't do it alone, we need God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost in our lives, ask him to enter and you'll feel such a relief and happiness or just relaxation that God is there, carrying you if you're too weak to make the steps yourself. Love him, let him guide you. He made you, you are wonderful in his image. No matter if you're gay, lesbian, trans or straight. You are what you are because God make you this way.

Palm Sunday Mass

While winding down on a lovely day, I feel so emotional right now. I have absorbed as much as I can from the Mass this morning at church. It was Palm Sunday and I feel it made me very emotional and touching this year. I feel this Lenten season has touch my heart and soul very deeply this year. Usually I go to a few massing during lent and miss Palm Sunday and Ash Wednesday. Not this year. The first Sunday of lent I had a vision and felt touched by God himself. I can't explain, but I just feel touched. 

Today, I was in terrible intense pain throughout my body, knew I wasn't going to be able to sit through mass. I wanted to say no not go, let Troy go on his own. But something prompted me to get dressed and go, even with the pain being the worse it had been this year. While in church, during the reading and the Eucharist, I felt something, or someone enter my body and touch my heart. Once again, I was without pain for nearly the whole service. I have never been without pain, ask my friends and family. It was an amazing service and I feel God is guiding me through St Mark Church, to be a better catholic and be a prayer warrior. 

Wednesday evening meetings with my C.R.H.P. sisters is good. We talk about our week, then read scripture and then from the book from church and it for the Lenten season. I believe Suzie Q might be right, I have turned into a prayer warrior. I can't explain it, but when I feel the need to prayer, I hear the words of what I should say. it's like God is prompting me and guiding me in prayer. Lately I've been praying for Barbara, Helen and Michelle. I believe in the fact God answers prayer if you ask and pray with a sincere heart. 

If you want forgiveness, prayer, with a contrite spirit and a sincere heart and you'll get the answer to any prayer. But remember one thing, it's in God's time not our time. We have to understand that God is there guiding and showing us the right path to follow. Believe me when I say he is there, just ask him to enter your heart, soul, mind and body and he will come. I believe he  is there for me and my friends. I know believing in God can be hard and frustrating at times. But he is there listen to his words, but to be able to listen to God, you have to believe and have faith.

Faith and understanding go hand in hand with having a Christian background helps too. If you feel alone, feeble or weak in anyway, just ask God to help, he will come if you just ask him. Ask and you will receive, knock and the door will open. Remember to read your bible daily and pray about what you read and use it into your daily lives.Without God you have no hope, no love, no reassurance of happiness.

Ask yourself one question. Does God want me? The answers is Yes. God wants you, he loves you unconditionally. He has opened his arms, and all you have to do is run to him and he will wrap his loving arms around you. Carry you when your weak, be there when you feeling lonely and scared. He is there, let him into your heart. Trust me, he is there, you just have to ask and believe. You'll know once you feel his presence in your heart and body. Let the Holy Ghost guide you back to God.

Tuesday Boredom

I woke up from a bad night, wanting to do something, but couldn't get the inspiration to write. I started to hear his voices again, like I have nothing better to do than listen to God's voice. Doesn't he ever stop? Well with me it seems he wants me to be aware and let people know he is there and if you want to have a closer look into your hear, soul, mind and body, he'll come to you too. Maybe I should get him to go to Suzie and she can deal with his voice and talking to her. But no it's me he talks to. Why me? Why not someone else?

Why me?
Well I believe he is talking tom be because he needs me to know of his thoughts and feeling about my life and the lives of others around me. Maybe if I had to think long and hard, I believe he is talking to me, to help me better understand the working of God and how he has always been with me throughout my life. I sure wish he go talk with my family, maybe get them to understand that I, yes I am free from them. Don't get me wrong, I love my family, but I also hate what they did to me. I know it had to happen, but part of me feels that maybe if I'd been adopted maybe I wouldn't be the strong person everyone believes I am today.

Why not someone else?
Well God made it so I was made into a strong arm of his mighty power. I believe he wanted me to experience things beyond my control, to make me a stronghold of his love, his unconditional love. Yes, I know. God does love his people, that includes you. We are loved unconditionally. Yeah, I know. I went through hell and back and know of others who have had the journey worse than me and not as bad as me too. I feel God is guiding me, showing me his mighty hand. wanting us all to know when we feel so alone, so lost, so afraid of what is coming and what has taken place. He is going to always be there, you are never alone. Yes, NEVER!

When you feel weak, alone, scared, afraid close your eyes, and ask God to come into your heart, body, soul and mind. To enter your body and help you deal with the issues you're faced with daily. Yesterday was a bad day for me. It was the day my grandmother died. I wish I could tell her, she is loved and I'd never forget her kindness and love.