Right now I'm listening to music on youtube. The song in previous post, is one my favorite songs. It makes me think of my friends Taryn and Gavin. Plus right now I remembering them and my children. This is making me cry and sad. I just have to remember they are in heaven with God and no longer in pain. This sometimes makes me feel a little better. I've never told anyone, but I cry everynight, because everyone at church, have their children. Were as myself, I have no kids left.
Having children is a blessing, God's blessing. But why was I treated so badly. I have had eleven children, only two living past the age of 5yrs. Kieran died at age 18, Paul at age 26. Now this makes me angry and also sad. I could tell you all about each of my children and know they are in heaven. One day I know I could join them. But when you've had a terrible past like myself. Maybe going to heaven isn't on the cards.
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